Bite Me! (2004)
Starring Misty Mundae, Julian Wells, Rob Monkiewicz, Erika Smith, and Caitlin Ross
Written and Directed by Brett Piper
Genre: Horror-Comedy, Monster Movie, Erotica
Rating: 7.8
Another low budget erotic horror film from the house of I.E. Independent Cinema, aka POPCinema, Bite Me! is one of my favorite Misty Mundae movies. Most of my favorites were written and directed by Brett Piper (excluding movies done after she left the company), who is in my opinion their best director. Bite Me! is a tale of a strip club that's having some problems.
The credits begin with a nice montage of Misty working the pole. Misty Mundae, Erika smith, and Caitlin Ross play three strippers working for an on-it's-last-legs strip joint. The owner needs some quick cash to pay back money he owes to Brooklyn business woman-and-wife-of-the-last-owner-Teresa, before she takes over the place, and so buys some marijuana from two thugs. The two thugs, on their way to the club, are attacked by a large spider that found it's way out of the crate of drugs. Scared shitless, they crash. Another guy involved in the drug business witnesses this, and brings the drugs to the club himself. The owner stores them, but is still uptight as he still needs more money to pay off his debt.
At the club, the spiders begin to infiltrate the place. The bartender gets bitten, and the venom turns her from a man loving chick to a thirsty lesbian. Theresa gets bitten, and it has the same Sapphic effect. The two of them get together for some wild sex under a sheet. Misty gets bitten in the shower, naked, and gets turned into a badass bug-hunting vigilante. An exterminator (Monkiewicz) is called in to deal with the situation, without letting the few customers left know what's up. He is hilarious. I mean I seriously love this guy, and lucky for me, he's in some more Brett Piper films!
Misty and the exterminator are in the basement bug hunting, and they also have to deal with a crazy ex FED who is determined to shut the place down and thereby win his place back in the government. However, he's having trouble locating either the marijuana that he knew would be there (as he was involved in the sale) or the bugs. Exterminator guy shoots some of the bugs with bug repellent, but it only make them grow bigger. They start hacking them with an axe, and crazy ex FED gets eaten. They eventually follow the trail of bugs to the huge dinosaur shaped storage sheds in back of the club, and discover that crazy ex FED is not dead, but has actually mutated into a giant, ugly stop-motion bug-man. Exterminator kills him, and, after Misty gets the girls out of the club, he blows the whole place to bits. As they all drive away, a humongous computer generated spider crawls out of the wreckage.
This movie is, again, low budget, as is given away by the completely fake looking animated bugs, huge dinosaur buildings projected from miniatures, and "club" built out of what looks like an empty warehouse, but it's done pretty stylishly considering what the director had to work with. There are some genuinely funny moments, and over all, I quite enjoyed this film. Plus I love Misty! It's not for everyone however. Recommended for it's type of film!!
The bugs are fake, the dinosaurs are miniatures (interesting story behind that) but the club was real. No warehouses were harmed in the making of this movie.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment! And sorry, my bad ;) glad to hear the warehouses are AOK. I really loved all the hilarious bugs and dinosaurs, they just make the whole experience better. What is the interesting story behind the dinosaurs? Absolutely love all of your work, I am a huge fan! My favorite is Shock-o-Rama, I am hoping to review it soon. I am also really looking forward to seeing your newest films that are coming out.
DeleteWhile scouting locations for BITE ME I found a club which actually had life sized fiberglass dinosaurs out back. I made a deal to use it and eagerly wrote the statues into the script, but about three days before shooting I called the owner to confirm something and he told me he'd changed his mind and we couldn't shoot there, hence the hastily fabricated models matted into the final film. Ironically setting the movie in a strip club was the idea of the original lead actress, who also backed out just before shooting. Glad you like SHOCK-O-RAMA, it may be my favorite too, but you'll never seen it in all its glory. The studio cheaped out on the DVD master and it's literally a pale copy of the movie it was.
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